Although, I
anticipate some backlash, I’m going to say it. Being a stay at home mom is
incredibly boring. Not all the time, but I would say, like 96% of the time.
Don’t get me wrong; it’s great to be able to afford the luxury of being at home
with K. I know many moms who would
jump at the chance to be in these practical, comfortable, mom-shoes. These are the most precious years right?! Unfortunately,
“precious” doesn’t translate into stimulating (or even intelligible)
conversation, peaceful contemplation or even respectful interactions (cue K
jabbing me in the eye with his index finger- followed by laughter…his of course.). If any mom begs to
differ, the publishing of a “how-to manual” would be greatly appreciated because
you, my friend, are some sort of supernatural being and are holding out on the
rest of us poor suckers.
Being a
stay-at-home mom (SAHM) is a full-time job, despite what some people think, and
a challenging (and crappily-paying) one at that. Now, I’m not going to go into
detail about this fact or draw witty
parallels between SAHMs and CEOs, but I could, and there have been many, much
funnier, woman who have done this (you can Google them, if you’re having
trouble drawing a comparison, or appreciating this fact). Instead, I’m going to
talk about a couple different ways SAHMs tackle this whirlwind of an
occupation.
But first, I
should clarify; when I talk about SAHMs, I’m talking about staying at home,
post maternity-leave. Maternity-leavers are often the biggest offender to the
SAHM, as they have up to one magical year of baby-snuggles, stereotypical
“firsts”, and of course all of the sleep-deprived wonderfulness that comes with
the first year of a tiny human’s life. While, they can appreciate the boredom,
and exhaustion that comes with being a full-time caregiver, they inevitably
have that “light at the end of the tunnel” return to the workforce, which in
fairness to them, they may be dreading. But nonetheless, this perspective often
translates to the following phrase, “I would love to be at home with my baby, I
miss him/her so much when I go to work” and “oh, man, I know how you feel, when
I was at home it was _____ too!”, or something to that effect. These types of
statements, not only make me want to roll my eyes, but they also make me feel
really guilty. However, much of mummyhood is about managing mom-guilt, so allow
me to manage away! Also, to the working mum, kudos, it must be tough, but I
don’t have that perspective, so it will be up to one of you to write that post.
There are many different
types of SAHMs, and I know for a fact that while all must have boring moments
during the day, some are better at keeping a baseline level of entertainment in
their lives. I can’t possibly account for all types of SAHM, so I’ll just speak
to three different types:
1. Etsy Mums- These moms are super crafty. They are
your stereotypical SAHM taken to the next level. They not only excel at arts
and crafts, but also have converted their talents into paying gigs. They make
up 99% of Etsy stores, but you can also find them peddling their products at
your local farmers markets, at Mum Groups and on Mum BST websites. These mums
are good, I doubt they are as bored as the rest of us, one may say they are
rocking (or painting, or sewing, or knitting…) this whole SAHM thing.
My only complaint with the Etsy-Mum
movement is that anytime “boredom” is brought up in conversation, it is
inevitably suggested that I take up a hobby/craft. No offence to the Etsy mums,
but this is not for me; I can’t foresee myself creating one-of-a-kind
masterpieces on the daily (mine take 9 months of baking… haha).
2. Blogger Mums- To be a true Blogger mum, you have to be
really committed. Like iron-man training committed. Unfortunately for the real
blogging mamas, there are a lot of Blogger Mama Posers out there. We only have
a few followers. We only post once ever 3 months (if that). The only people
giving us feedback are our significant others (who, after being forced to read our
posts, fearfully only give rave reviews) and our own mums (who secretly
chuckle that we are being paid back for many years of their dealing with our
pre-mum antics). Jokes on us though, because real bloggers morph all of those
boring moments into entertaining ones by taking the opportunity to avidly
gather content for future posts (that they diligently write) AND are paid
for their cleverly crafted opinion pieces on motherhood.
3. Those who drink wine- While this is pretty self-explanatory, I
will elaborate a bit. One can replace wine with any tasty beverage really;
fancy coffees, infused water, we do not discriminate! This category is for us
mums who haven’t found our SAHM calling yet. Those who need a few minutes of
escape from the boring that could consume our very personhood. Those of us who
have chosen this path of parenting, but second-guess our decision every third
minute or so. The time it takes us to consume these delicious beverages is
usually the amount of time needed to refresh and recharge our mum batteries. It
also allows us to feel like a real grown up, if only for a brief moment (until
the reality of the fact that that handsome barista is really just a
precariously piled stack of dishes from last night- and the insightful
conversation you are having is really going something like this “go get your
train, trains say choo choo, yes mummy would love to hold your train, oh! You
want it back?! Ok here you go…”). The only problem with this category is that
the benefit of wine (beverage) drinking is short lived (and it's hard to find someone to pay you to indulge). Hahah
Now that we are back from vacation, all settled in our new city, and D has started residency, reality has set in. Adjusting to
life as a SAHM has been a challenge for me. Staying at home with your
child(ren) takes a level of creativity and ingenuity that I definitely did not
expect. While this lifestyle has not come naturally to me, I am having fun
trying to figure out where I fit on the SAHM spectrum. I know it’s only a
matter of time before I figure something out, as the boredom of the daily grind
has me chompin’ at the bit. But for now, I shall sit here sipping my Grande
Caramel Machiatto sharing my poser-blogger thoughts with you all!
Until Next Time my
Friends!
-A
 |
| All Dressed Up for Daddy's Convocation |
No comments:
Post a Comment