New Year, New Leaf.

Hello Friends,

Well the holidays flew right by for our little family, as I'm sure they did for many of you! After a whirlwind of turkey and presents and family and friends and santa and snowmen and skating and christmas baking, I find myself plopped comfortably on the couch listening to K naptime negotiate another story with D. I must say, a whole new level of toddler has emerged out of this year's Christmas season. A negotiating, back-talking, smug, certain, self-confident, independent little man has replaced the cheeky, soft spoken, dependent little 1 1/2 year old who lived with us in the beginning of 

December.

But, to be honest, I'm surprisingly okay with this. In fact, I'm excited! K is really becoming his own little person. A little person who is able to articulate his likes and dislikes, take control of his playtime and most importantly tell us how important we are to him (especially at 7am when I'm trying to squeeze in another 1/2hr of much needed "beauty rest") "mum up mum come!". It is in these moments that I'm reminded that there is nothing more "motivating" than a toddler with an agenda. 

K does not take "no" for an answer, and as much as I may regret saying this in the minutes and months and years to come, I wouldn't want it any other way! K has a perspective, and even though it sometimes differs from mine (and any other sane human being on the planet), it is his and that deserves respect. 

That being said, I must also add that it is a powerful moment when, as a parent, you realize the respect you have for your child. Not basic human respect (obviously that has always been there), but respect for his thinking, for his ideas, for his goals, for his individuality. Over the last couple weeks it has dawned on me that our tiny human, has thoughts and feelings that are seperate from ours and it has filled me with pride to see them emerge.

Now, I'm not saying that we don't have rules and we don't enforce our "no" answers, we most definitely do. It's just that we also try to acknowledge his protest and validate our little man's perspective with compromise. However, if all else fails, which it often does, we're not above throwing in a bit [read: a lot] of distraction and parental manipulation. Ya gotta do what ya gotta do. I mean, there's only so many stories you can read at naptime, before it becomes bedtime!

Needless to say, K has grown and changed a whole lot throughout 2014 and I must say, that I too, feel like I've done a lot of growing and changing as a mum. While I still sometimes feel like I'm completely winging this mummyhood thing, I'm happy to report that most of the time I feel like I've got it together. 

So what does one do when they feel like they've got it all together? 

Change it up of course! 

By adding a new leaf, to the good ole' family tree.

Happy New Years everyone, I know 2015 will be one exciting year for us!

Until next year friends, 

-A

P.S I can't wait to hear K's explanation of how new leaves grow in the winter. 

Baby R- Coming June 2015

What does 21 Months (Almost Two) Look Like?

Hello Friends,

Today I realized that my baby turned 21 months old. Twenty-one months? How did that happen?! After the inital shock of having an almost 2 year old wore off, I also realized, that I should probably stop giving his age in months. It's confusing. So from now on, "K will be two in March".

So what does having a 21 month old... uh I mean an "almost two year old", look like?

Well that, my friends, depends on a whole whack of factors.

1. What time of the day is it? 

If it is immediately preceding a meal, it might look like this...

Unless that meal is going to be McDonalds ("Don's) or pizza, then it likely looks like this...

If it is immediately following a meal, it may look like this...

Unless you mentioned naptime, then it's probably like this...

2. Who's around?

If it's just me and K, it could look like this...

Or this...

Or this...

If his papa is in the house, it most likely looks like this...

If Daddy's here it usually looks something like this...

Or this...

3. What is he doing?

Something he's not usually supposed/allowed to do (like standing on a chair), then it looks like this...

Something I would like him to do...

Something he wants me to let him do...

4. How important is it that I capture the moment?

Not very important, it tends to look like this...

Or this...

More important (we could use it for the Christmas cards...), tends to look more like this...

Ah, maybe next year!

So as you can see, having an almost two year old can look like a bunch of different things. As a stay at home mum, I get the "pleasure" of seeing almost all of these (often multiple times a day). While some of his looks make me want to scream and rip my hair out, I also get to exclusive access to the ones that would make any heart melt so quickly that all those other ones just disappear from memory. Needless to say, I am loving being at home with my almost two year old (and his quirkly little personality). 

Until next time my friends, 

-A

Life and Basketball

Hi Friends,

I'm so sorry that it's been 2 whole months since my last post. Fall 2014 has been jam-packed with fun and adventure, and sadly my writing took a backseat. But I'm back and ready to dive back in. So here we go.

Today I would like to talk about Life and Basketball (yes, this was meant to conjure up happy, nostalgic memories of the 2000 hit Love and Basketball, probably my most favourite movie of all time, but I digress). In October, I made the decision to get involved with our local intra-city, basketball association. As a stay at home mum for just over a year and a half, I was starting to feel like I was losing myself a bit in my full-time role as mummy. After exploring a number of volunteer opportunities, I (not surprisingly) found myself drawn to this particular basketball association.

For anyone that knows me, you will know that basketball played an integral role in my teenage and young adult life (beyond being a heart healthy activity). For me, it promoted healthy relationships (when I found myself running with some rough crowds), it taught goal development (when life's obstacles seemed too tough to surmount), and self control (when my attitude was rearing it's ugly head) and encouraged dreams (when my young mind felt muted). I have nothing but utmost respect for my fellow players, coaches and referees, all of whom helped direct me down the path I am on today (which is a pretty darn good one).

I was excited to again be a part of the sport which had given me so much over the years. After joining the executive, I was given the opportunity to co-coach two teams. The first being a group of 5-7 year olds, the second a team of 14-18 year old ladies. While I could anticipate the challenges a large group of little kids with basketballs could bring, I was in no way prepared for the challenges that would come with the teenage girls. After all, I was a teenage girl not that long ago, so I would totally "get" them, right?

Right?!

Wrong.

I was a 14 years old, 14 years ago, and in teenager-land, that makes me one of the furthest things from a teenager.  

I might as well have walked into that gym with a walker.

However, after the inital shock of old age wore off, I realized that I was staring straight at myself (or 8 of me) 14 years ago, and I began to think. If I could go back and talk to myself 14 years ago, what would I want to say? Or better yet, what would 14 year old me want to hear?

It was time to reflect. What I loved so much about playing basketball, was that it allowed me to have a hint of control over one aspect of the chaos that is teenage life. With sex, drugs and rock n' roll hiding around every corner, the basketball court was a place of predictability and stability. It was a rock for me. My coaches didn't try to be my best friends, and they didn't try to be my parents. They treated me like an colleague, a grown up, they let me make decisions and supported me through the outcomes, be they sucessess or consequences. Most of all they never hesitated to convey how much they believed in me, not just as an athlete, or player, but as an individual capable of doing great things in life. They didn't always do this by holding my hand through tough times, or patting me on the back when I did good, but through challenging me to be better, to be my best.

I could never thank these men and women enough, and they will never know how much their presence in my life impacted me. These people were all volunteers and didn't have to be there for a group of (sometimes obnoxious) teenagers, but they were, every week, for the better part of many years.

Now the tables have turned, and I find myself standing in their shoes (mighty big shoes to fill). Do I feel a bit like an imposter? Of course. Do I worry that I will say or do the wrong thing, and send these girls down a path of chaos and destruction? Every time I enter the gym.

So I've been challenging myself to step back and appreciate that by simply showing up, I'm giving these girls a great opportunity to be in control of that small piece of their worlds. Likewise, they are giving me an opportunity to reclaim a bit of myself that has been tucked away under my mum jeans.

And I'm cool with that (for the record, that is NOT what the kids are saying these days).

Until next time friends,

- A

Taking a break from my Masters to shoot some hoops! Circa 2012