I'm a Mum... Holy crap.

Hello world.

That's right I'm a mum! 

Now, I know being a mum is nothing new. New mums are, in fact, born everyday, but as I sit on the couch drinking my tea and watching yet another recorded episode of "The Voice" it dawns on me... I, Amanda R, am mum (and to the most amazing little boy in the entire world- I must add)! 

These first few months have been a whirlwind and while I've been diligent about capturing every. single. movement our little guy makes on my camera phone, it has come to my attention that I have not captured a single memory in written form! This was somewhat of a shock to me as throughout my 6 years of post-secondary education, I have come to really value the importance of written self-reflection (insert eye-roll from each and every one of my classmates.. haha). But in all seriousness, I want to be the best mum I can be. And if academia has taught me anything, to develop and grow in any role, one must prioritize and seek out opportunities for continuous learning. So that brings me back to tonight, where I've now shut off the T.V. in an attempt to find words to capture the adventure that has been mummyhood.

* I've decided to use a blog as a vehicle for these adventures so that other new-mums can laugh, love and learn alongside me, and more seasoned mums can mainly laugh (remembering though, that every mum was once a "new-mum"). 

K J R- 8lbs 5oz

I became a mum on March 15, 2013 at exactly 12:18am. While many mums may say they became mums the instant that 2 lines (or a happy face, or a digital "pregnant") appeared on the home pregnancy test, I can honestly say that for me that was not the case. Those feelings, while at the time felt so impressive, paled in comparison to those I experienced when they placed my screaming, gooey, puffy-faced baby on my chest. As I looked down at this real live human being, something had changed, I was his mum! Now, what I wasn't expecting was how utterly clueless I was about to feel...

Baby K had been born via c-section, so I was in the hospital for 2 days following his birth. For those two days, I didn't have to change a single diaper, or retrieve the baby from his bassinet for feedings (I have the most amazing husband). I also didn't have to think about those new-mum worries (Is he breathing? Is he swaddled too tight? Does he have a fever? Is that jaundice?) since the nurses were in every couple hours to check on him (and me). I'd like to think I was able to "ease" into my new role as mummy by completing an "observership"(minus the breastfeeding- that got "real" very quickly.. haha). However, when our discharge day arrived D and I stood at the hospital entrance, baby in tow looking at each other thinking, "Are they really letting us walk out with this little guy? We are not qualified to do this. Poop just got real"...

Honestly, those first few weeks just flew right by, although at the time, they seemed endless. Breastfeeding was no walk in the park, and neither was recovering from someone slicing through the better part of your abdomen. But I had lots of help from D and other family and friends, so that part was  not too bad at all. It was when D went back to work, and the visitors slowed down that I found myself staring at my adorable baby boy thinking "now what?".  I had learned all about infant development in school and how to promote healthy development, so there I was, down on the floor dangling, brushing, rubbing, patting and tapping all sorts of sensory materials, but all K wanted to do was sleep and eat. What was wrong with him? Am I that crappy of a mom already? Where was the happy smiling Johnson and Johnson baby that looks at his mum with those big shining "I love you" eyes. All I could get from K were blank stares. What I failed to realize, was that adorable "commercial baby" was 3 months old, looking back I now understand that there was absolutely nothing wrong with my little guy, he was simply a newborn baby... haha who knew? But it sure added some new-mum stress to those first few weeks. To remember: Newborn babies sleep, cry, poop and eat... that is all. (Those seasoned mums, doctors, and nurses that tried to tell you that, were not lying to you.) 

Sleeping- Perfectly normal for a newborn!

Well I have learned much much much more, and I'm continuing to learn more every day! However, it is  getting late, and I should try to get some sleep before K wakes up for his next meal. Until next time my friends!

-A